Tottenham v Fulham: Premier League – live

⚽ Updates from the 8pm GMT kick-off in north London
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Pre-match predictions / Drinking Vessel Liquid-to-Air Ratio Analysis. “Sterling work re. preamble; by stating the bleeding obvious, that this has got stinker written all over it, we will now of course be treated to a goal-buster of epic proportions. And if not, can’t say we weren’t warned, eh? Lovely stuff, can’t wait” – Dave Estherby

“The Fulham fan (ie. me) says: ‘This is Spurs, they are rubbish at home, we might actually do something away. Ah no, we’re Fulham after all, this is when Spurs find their home form.’ The Spurs fan says: ‘This is Fulham, they are rubbish away, we might actually do something at home. Ah no, we’re Spurs after all, this is when Fulham find their away form.’ The neutral says: ‘One team’s rubbish at home, the other’s rubbish away, this is going to be a crap game.’ No prizes for guessing who’s going to be right” – Richard Hirst